Hire A Dwarf In Skegness

Hi we are looking to hire a Dwarf for friday the 11th of june in skegness for the period of 6pm until 10.00 am the next morning. We would want him to dress as a smurf and be handcuffed to the groom for this period of time, he must have a sense of humour and he will be in safe hands as we are all in our late 30`s and would be well paid and looked after, please get in touch if anyone can put me onto someone asap, many thanks Richard